


maybe most perfect

by frecklebombfic (frecklebomb), lotts (LottieAnna)



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Always a Different Sex, Audio Format: M4B, Audio Format: MP3, Audio Format: Streaming, Awesome Ladies Podfic Anthology VIII, F/F, Podfic, Podfic & Podficced Works, Podfic Length: 10-20 Minutes, Rule 63, Women in the NHL
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-17
Updated: 2018-02-21
Packaged: 2019-03-15 04:10:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13605249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frecklebomb/pseuds/frecklebombfic, https://archiveofourown.org/users/LottieAnna/pseuds/lotts
Summary: She thought that’s just how it was: girls who liked makeup didn’t play hockey with the boys, because if you’re a girl amongst boys, you can’t be a really girly kind of girl.Clearly, 12-year-old Mat didn’t know much about girls.





	1. Text

**Author's Note:**

> IF YOU FOUND THIS THROUGH GOOGLING, KNOW ANYONE MENTIONED IN THIS STORY PERSONALLY, OR ARE MENTIONED YOURSELF: please, please click away. This is a work of fiction and nothing written in this story is true. Any accurate information used in this story is publicly available information about public figures, the rest is made up, 100%.
> 
> \- - - 
> 
> Now complete, with the podfic added on chapter 2!
> 
> \- - -
> 
> (From Lotts:) Thanks to frecklebomb, for letting me know about the Awesome Ladies Podfic Anthology, for inspiring me to write this story, and for lending her beautiful voice to it, along with lovely music choices and a gorgeous cover. This collab is a fannish dream come true, and I can't wait until the podfic goes live soon!
> 
> (From frecklebomb) lotts! this collab was a dream to record, thank you so much jumping on board with it, and for writing this beautiful story so fast ♥

No one says, outright, that the reason no one talks about the Islanders is because they’re the only NHL team with more women on their roster than men, but everyone knows it anyway. 

The thing is, it’s politicized, right, because if someone says, “The team with all the women is doing really well,” then it’ll come across as, “Women are better at hockey,” but if someone says, “The team with all the women is playing poorly,” then it sounds sexist, so most people don’t talk about them at all, even though there’s plenty to talk about. 

In Mat’s opinion, the Islanders are a strong team with strong players, real contenders when things go their way, but sometimes they hit slumps and drop in the standings. 

In other words, they’re an NHL team, just like all the other teams in the league. There’s not much more to it than that. 

***

The Islanders draft Mat, and then they draft Tito, and that’s good, because Mat really likes Tito. Tito’s funny, and she’s nice, and she loves the fact that Mat speaks French. 

“When we’re in New York, I won’t let your French get rusty,” Tito assures her. 

“When we’re in New York,” Mat echoes. “Wow.” 

“I know,” Tito says, grinning, and a strand of hair falls in her face. 

Mat stares at her for a second. Tito has a great smile, and her hair is always neat and nice and smooth. Mat appreciates her own hair, loves the way it always manages to look the perfect amount of out-of-control, the way it falls into a expertly messy bun without her having to try very hard, but there’s something about Tito’s hair she’s always been a little bit jealous of. Tito complains about it—says it’s too boring, too thin, too flat—but Mat thinks it suits her. It looks very soft, and sometimes Mat thinks about running her hands through it. 

Or, okay. She thinks about running her hands through it… a lot, if she’s being honest. Mat’s got the kind of hair fingers get tangled in, but Tito’s hair is the kind they glide through, like something out of a shampoo commercial. 

“Mathew?” Tito says, tucking the loose strand of hair behind her ear.

Mat blinks, tears her eyes away from the spot where Tito’s hair ends, right under her chin. “Yeah?” 

“You zoned out for a sec,” Tito says. “Everything alright?” 

“Yeah, sorry, just—what lipgloss is that?” 

“What?” Tito says, giggling in the same way Mat does, sometimes, when she’s trying to talk her way out of a speeding ticket, or convince a guy to let her copy his math homework, or throw off boys on opposing teams in the faceoff circle. It’s an effective giggle, and this is the first time Mat’s been on the other end of it. 

“Your lipgloss,” Mat repeats. “It looks really pretty.” 

Tito blushes, and Mat’s heart soars, and that’s—well, that’s something, for sure. 

***

Of course Mat was a tomboy growing up. 

She just didn’t really have time to get into the girly stuff, and then the boys on her team would make fun of girls for liking pink clothes and wearing makeup, so Mat would play along, act like she hated that stuff too, even though she didn’t have an opinion one way or the other. She thought that’s just how it was: girls who liked makeup didn’t play hockey with the boys, because if you’re a girl amongst boys, you can’t be a really girly kind of girl.

Clearly, 12-year-old Mat didn’t know much about girls. 

***

Mat had known, when the Islanders first drafted her, that there were probably benefits to not being the only girl in the locker room, but she was nervous anyway, because Mat’s never been great around other girls. Not like, individually, but in groups, it’s always been… uncomfortable, like there are unwritten rules she missed out on learning, because she was too busy playing hockey. Most CHL teams only have one or two girls on their roster, and even though Hockey Canada requires a 50/50 split, that’d only ever been for a short period of time. 

It’s not that she’d expected it to be, like, a sorority, but she’d expected more… girl power, sisterhood, support-other-women talk. 

But really, it’s not that different from a mostly-guys team at all. John’s probably the most unassuming trailblazer Mat’s ever encountered, even though people have been calling her a feminist icon since she was 14. She makes it clear that she’s just a person who wants to play the best hockey there is, and honestly, Mat can relate. 

It’s just—it’s funny, because Mat’s spent so much of her life trying to ignore the fact that she’s a girl, but there are moments when it’s the first thing on her mind, like when she has the most embarrassing NHL debut possible and all she can think about are the gruelling extra tryouts she’d had to go through to get onto “co-ed” teams as a kid. Those aren’t a thing anymore, but still, the NHL is a men’s hockey league with a handful of women, apart from the Islanders, and no one talks about the Islanders. 

Mat loves being special, and a part of her had been worried that once she was on the Islanders, she wouldn’t stand out to anyone anymore, but then she plays the puck from the box, and for a second, she feels like she’s let a generation of girls down, until she remembers that there are women on the ice currently killing the penalty she’s serving. 

It’s still a pretty bad fuck-up, but still. It’s nice to not have to be the best right off the bat, just to prove that she deserves to be there someday.

***

By the time Mat makes it to the NHL, she’s really good at doing her makeup. Theoretically. 

She never actually does it, but apparently Sanger’s really into YouTube tutorials, which got Tito into them, which got both of them sending links to their group chat, and Mat hates being left out, so she’d started watching them, too. It didn’t exactly make up for being across the country and back in the Dub while they were both experiencing the NHL, but it pays off eventually, because Mat can hold her own in a conversation about Naked Palettes and contouring by the time her third Islanders camp rolls around. 

“Why do you watch so many videos, anyway? You hardly wear makeup,” Tito says. 

“The videos are fun to watch,” she says. “As someone who’s never really been into that kind of thing.” 

Tito smiles. “Why?”

“I mean, I’ve never really been into girl stuff for myself, but that doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate it on other people,” Mat says. “That shit’s impressive.” 

“You mean, like, the women in the videos?” Tito asks. 

“Them,” Mat says, and then she hesitates. “And also you.” 

Tito blushes, but Mat can only see it out of the corner of her eye, because she’s staring very pointedly at a loose thread on the hotel comforter. 

“I mean, I’m not that good, but—”

“Bullshit, you’re incredible,” Mat says. “Better than half the videos you send.” 

“Well, I practice a lot,” Tito says. “Not all of us have faces like yours.” 

Mat’s thankful she has years of experience of pretending to be confident, because otherwise she’s not sure she’d be able to speak. “Your face is great with or without makeup, that’s not the point.” 

“Then what is the point?” 

“That you’re really talented,” Mat says, and it’s probably a little more forceful than the conversation warrants, but she really just wants Tito to take the compliment.

“Oh,” Tito says. “That’s—thank you.” 

Mat shrugs. “You’re welcome?” 

There’s a beat, and then Tito says, “I could do your makeup for you, if you want.”  

Mat chuckles, then looks up at Tito, and her face is probably really red, but whatever. “Nah, I’m good.”

“Are you sure?” 

“Positive,” Mat says. 

Tito stares at her, and it’s a stare that Mat’s used to, except it’s not a stare she’s ever gotten from another girl before. 

Maybe 20-year-old Mat doesn’t know much about girls, either. 

“Hey,” Tito says. “Can I—if I try something, would it be weird?”

“What do you want to try?” Mat says, her heart pounding a little. 

“I—” Tito starts, but she cuts herself off, and, after a second of hesitation, she leans in, and then— 

They’re kissing. 

There’s a lot that Mat should be thinking about—the fact that Tito’s a girl, and her teammate, and her friend, and Mat’s not even sure how long she’s wanted this for—but she ignores all that, because right now, all she can think about is the fact that she’s running her hands through Tito’s hair, and it’s even softer than she’d imagined.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (From Lotts:) I'm lottswrites on tumblr and @lottslottslotts on twitter!
> 
> (frecklebomb) I'm frecklebombfic on both twitter and tumblr! 
> 
> \- - - 
> 
> Please be generous with your kudos and comments, and consider listening/reading and leaving feedback for both the text and the podfic versions ❤️


	2. Podfic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Created for the [Awesome Ladies Podfic Anthology VIII](https://halfamoon.dreamwidth.org/304360.html) (link to dreamwidth post, where you can find full anthology downloads).

Cover design by frecklebombfic  
Images by [Luca Iaconelli](https://unsplash.com/@luxdamore) and [Dan Gold](https://unsplash.com/@danielcgold). 

The music used in this podfic is This Feeling by Alabama Shakes ([Youtube link](https://youtu.be/Ub6XFO0ca5Q)).

| 

### maybe most perfect

###### Podfic duration:

00:14:31 (inc ~2min freetalk & music) 

###### Downloads:

  * [MP3 & streaming](https://www.dropbox.com/s/bv9lt2r73g38twg/%5BHockey%20RPF%5D%20maybe%20most%20perfect_freetalk.mp3?dl=0) | 6.41 MB
  * [M4B audiobook](http://www.mediafire.com/file/cbusq7jl8441umk/%5BHockey_RPF%5D_maybe_most_perfect.m4b) | 10.3 MB

  
---|---  
  
**Author's Note:**

> (From Lotts:) I'm lottswrites on tumblr and @lottslottslotts on twitter!
> 
> (frecklebomb) I'm frecklebombfic on both twitter and tumblr! 
> 
> \- - - 
> 
> Please be generous with your kudos and comments, and consider listening/reading and leaving feedback for both the text and the podfic versions ❤️


End file.
